Don’t Miss this Post: When Your 7-Year Old Announces ‘I’m Gay’.
“When Your 7-Year Old Announces ‘I’m Gay'” Huffington Post author “Amelia” on Michangelo Signorile show today, Friday, February 17, 2012 at 4:30pm EST. On Ch. 108, OUTQ SiriusXM. Free trial of SiriusXM online available.
My daughter woke me this morning with a sign that read “I Love U.” She’d gotten up early, made the sign, and actually waited until the alarm went off at 7 a.m. to run in and yell: “Happy Valentine’s Day!”
That is love.
Then we snuggled under the covers. She asked me to be her valentine. Of course I said “yes” and then we talked about what lie ahead for the day. In 5th grade Valentine’s Day is a pretty big deal. Her friend, S., likes a boy, A., and she left a note in his desk reading “Will you be my valentine? I like you.” She didn’t sign it, but all the girls are dying to see if he’ll drop a special valentine in her box.
My daughter’s friends have told her a boy in her class with blond hair and glasses likes her and everyone is speculating that he will give her a valentine. She said he reminds her of QKDad. Apparently that is a good thing, still.
She is not shy telling boys who declare their like for her that she likes girls, but I think she’d be perfectly happy if this boy sends her a nice valentine.
Seriously, who doesn’t like to be liked?
Today I appreciate those around me AND I am valentine to one of my favorite people in the world. Happy Day y’all.
I love how our queer kid has changed our lives.
Because of her . . .
I work harder to make the world better for all queer kids.
I have the chance to participate in her own amazing, unique journey.
I see the world through different eyes.
I am more courageous.
I demand more authenticity and truthfulness from myself. If she is going to put her identity on the line, I better do it too.
I have a great role model to follow.
I am a better person.
Thank you, my sweet girl. I love you.
Hugs. Lots of them.
It is clear to me now that holding my daughter is the most important gift I can give her during this period of intense growth. Since she chose to come out to the world she has grown up so much, but she also wants her mama to embrace her more than ever.
Last night during a long period of silent embrace she whispered, “it’s good to know someone’s here for me, whether it’s grades, sexual orientation, or sexual [gender] identity.”
These days I wonder all the time what we can do to inoculate our kids against the insidious onslaught of a bigoted society? Perhaps holding them as much as they need to be held, every time they ask for it is a start.
Check out the amazing video I just linked to on the Raising Queer Kids Facebook page. It is both a work of art and so touching. Watching it made me feel so clearly the importance of supporting kids, our own and others.
I so appreciate Randy Potts’ sacrifice and courage to go public. His story gives birth to real understanding, empathy, and conversation. Thank you Randy, even if I never meet you.
Hiding out in the bedroom with my coffee, sleeping dogs, and the laptop, the room is bright with the east light of late morning.
I hear giggles, shrieks, and incessant chatter. I smell bacon. More happy girl shrieks.
It is the morning of a sleepover with two of my daughter’s best friends.
Last night they were so loud, shrieking and laughing, and running out into the living room to show us their zombie makeup or the “NOH8” they’d stenciled on their faces like photos on the internet. I looked at my partner, winced, and said:
“I think it’s going to be like this for the next six years.”
He mimed wanting to end it all at the thought.
But I know this is exactly what being 10 years old is supposed to be like . . .
and in this moment I know everything is just as it should be.
Today is the 13th anniversary of the death of Matthew Shepard.
As a parent I want to make this world safer for my own child and everybody else’s gay child.
I won’t be able hide behind trees and crouch behind bushes while she goes to out into the world in order to make sure no harm comes to her.
What I can do is try to engage others in conversation about queer kids. Until she is older I can try to protect her from the ignorance or prejudice of people who know she is out.
I can be an ally and an advocate.
Yesterday I went to Safe Zone/Ally Training. I suggest that anyone who wants to make the world a safer place for members of the LGBT community consider spending an afternoon at a local training. I will proudly display my Safe Zone sticker beside my office door, so that anyone who needs a safe space will have one.
Moreover, displaying the Safe Zone sticker let’s others know they aren’t alone.
One can find plenty of information about being an ally information here.
Many universities regularly offer Safe Zone/Ally Training. Check with your local university’s LGBT Center or Women’s Center to see if or when they will offer a training session.