We Are Not Alone

(Cue ominous music.) We . . . are . . . not . . . alone.

Actually what I mean is that I am writing my heart out here about my own experiences as if my daughter and I are the only two people in the world. That is far from the truth. I have found surprising allies and made great new friends since my daughter has come out to the world. I have linked up with some smart, committed people in my community who care about kids, who care about the LGBT community, and who care about human rights in general. But to do that I had to reach out (and come out) to friends, acquaintances and strangers.

Since she is so young, I have to advocate for her in ways that I might not have to do when she is 14, 18 or 23. Advocating means speaking up and being active in my community. Advocating means remaining stalwart in my commitment and support for her, even if other people disapprove. Advocating means pushing back against being treated as “less than” even when you would rather avoid conflict.

My daughter’s decision to come out has forced me to come out too and I really like who this is forcing me to be. I am not just talking the talk of my beliefs, but walking the walk as well.

As a result of my honesty and conviction I have gained some wonderful fellow travelers. And best of all, I look forward to the life my daughter and I have stretched before us sharing our convictions for equality. She has reminded me who I was, who I have always wanted to be, and who I already am.

It is good not to be alone.

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